1.3.: The Decorator

"He bought the Haney place...Yeah, the Haney place. No...he don't look like a drinkin' man."

And so, the Douglas's spend their first night on the farm. They sleep on small cots Mr. Douglas rented from Mr. Haney. No electricity yet. So, their electric blankets are hooked up to the car battery. Lisa announces that if she is going to stay, Oliver must hire a decorator. The house is a real shambles. Cracked walls, peeling wallpaper, doorknobs falling off, holes in the floor...and it doesn't seem to faze Oliver one bit. He just want to farm...and he wants his farm wife to cook his breakfast.

Apart from people thinking Oliver's a bit nuts, Lisa's hotcakes are the longest running gag on the show. Over the next six years and 168 episodes, no matter how many times she cooks these things, they won't improve. And, here's something I forgot...Do you know who showed Lisa how to make hotcakes?

Kate Bradley. Remember what I said about Kate trying to help Lisa and having it come to nothing, unlike everything she did for people on Petticoat Junction. Well, here's another example. Kate arrives with a basket full of food. She and Lisa dive right into making hotcakes...and they are instantly terrible. They're either chewy and stretchable, like eating rubber, or they're so hard they can break a plate. I wonder why Kate doesn't have Lisa do another batch correctly? Maybe because Oliver eats it all with a big grin? Lisa's hotcakes will go through many variations over the next six years but never become good to eat. They will always be terrible. In fact, apart from when she has amnesia, Lisa never cooks anything worth eating. After a time, the viewer will start to worry for everyone's health. And, does Lisa eat the hotcakes too? I've never seen her do it.

The cooking of the hotcakes is just one part of the episode. The title may be "The Decorator" and the summaries you'll find may intimate that this is what the episode is about...but it's not. It's a thread that runs through the episode and caps off the ending but it's not the episode. There is no real plot. It's about their first complete day on the farm, but mostly in the house.

Oliver is trying to get the farm started. He still firmly believes in all the farming rhetoric in his mind. He is diligently poring over his Dept. of Agriculture pamphlets and telling Eb how a farm should be run. Lisa is trying to cook and trying to be a farm wife but she really has no clue. Eb is being sarcastic and trying to eat the hotcakes. Mr. Haney rents them a kitchen table. Oliver's Mother is coming to visit. Her series of faints when she arrives at the house are great. Her comments about "You don't have to keep a promise. You're a woman!" are, possibly, less great.

Just a quick bit on Oliver's mom: She shows up quite often in the first season and, most of the time, she will become the brunt of a joke but not always. When the second season begins and the show has far more interesting local supporting characters, she will fade away (with the notable exception of a rather bland episode). She's not without her charms but she's never that interesting, a holdover from the 50's or the radio sitcoms of the 40's. The big twist here is that she is not Oliver's mother-in-law but his mother. That twist is fine but sometimes she gets in the way. When they realize that the best way to use her is to team her up with Uncle Joe, then she really becomes fun.

Just a quick note to me: Jay & Dick began writing comedy for the radio. One of the things I've always loved about Green Acres is that it feels different from other sitcoms, at its best. I was never quite able to figure out why. Then, I read somewhere (Sorry, I've forgotten where) that the show is structured like a radio show, Fibber McGee and Molly or Jack Benny, for example. I think that's right and I want to write about that. But, not in this entry. Later. Maybe a separate entry.

Back to the review...

At this point in the show, Mr. Haney arriving with exactly what Oliver needs isn't strange. It's logical. At night, they'll need to rent cots. The next morning, they'll need to rent a table and chairs. Soon, he will arrive with some very prescient items but not yet. However, it's over in Mr. Drucker's store that the strangeness of Hooterville begins to rise.

Mr. Douglas shows up to ask about a decorator and get some basic staples for the house. There is a funny bit with Sam detailing his Honeymooner's Special, complete with a "Keep Smiling" sign. But, it's the other parts of their conversation that seem odd here but pretty natural later on. Mr. Drucker knows everything that is going on at the Douglas's house even though he hasn't been there or been told what's happening by someone who has been. How is that possible? Sam says he just keeps his ears open. Oliver is amazed. The ability everyone in Hooterville has of knowing everything Oliver & Lisa are doing just by turning an ear to the wind will grow as the show goes on. I'd forgotten it was Sam (who is still rooted in the "normal" world of Petticoat Junction) who first brings it up.

The last couple of minutes of this episode may be a little too sitcomy...the decorator joke is good but should come with a wacky series of tuba sounds on the soundtrack. And, when Oliver shows Lisa their One Week Anniversary cake with their fixed-up house on it, Lisa makes a joke and laughs at it. It seems strange. I don't think it would have seemed that way to someone watching the show for the first time from the beginning. Lisa is still a New York Gal here. The settling in is a gradual process.

The closing moment of the episode is nice and racy. Lisa blows out the candle and the bedroom goes into complete darkness. Pause. Lisa tells Oliver to be careful because he's crushing the cake. Now, that's good naughtiness! Apart from The Addams Family, I don't think any other couples were this affectionate in 60's sitcoms. I love it. It's a calm randiness that rides through the series.

Episode Three. Another great one. It moves very slow in comparison to something today but, compared to Petticoat Junction or My Three Sons, it whips along. Helped greatly by the fact that there are so many funny moments from the hotcakes to the fainting to the pulling of the cots through the front window to Mr. Haney's fake elation when he realizes that he has a table on his truck...Good stuff. And, slowly, the farm is being put together. That's a good thing.

Next episode: Is it all over? So soon!...No. It's just a little drama.